Nobody wants to know the truth, until their hearts been broken

There's a tight knot in my stomach, so tight it's squeezing the life out of me. A huge lump in my throat that is so painful it feels like swallowing blades.

I know what it is but I just can't say it out loud.

I am not in denial, I just don't like how it sounds. I guess, yeah, I just wanna hear what I wanna hear.
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Three for a girl, four for a boy

Giving it a second try. I kills me to say this but I think I screwed up big time, I can feel that he doesn't love me like he used to. Good job, self. Sigh.


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One for sorrow, two for joy

Jinxed it! This is just temporary, it seems. Getting off at the next station.. Adieu, my friend.

I shall be over with this as I had before. Love hurts but sometimes it's a good hurt. And it feels like I'm alive.
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Forever after, you and me, in different pictures

Everyday, walking up the stairs to my 5th floor apartment, I'd be hoping to see you waiting in front of my door. Back in the days, most of the times I would find you sitting on the floor, just outside my door, looking tired but your face would light up at the sight of me.

These days, walking up the stairs to my 5th floor apartment, I'd be hoping to see you waiting in front of my door. I don't know how would I react if you're really gonna be there. I don't know if I'm gonna laugh or cry first. Do I shake your hand or give you a hug? I don't know if I should ask you to come in, or we're just gonna talk outside.

And then we would catch up with each other's life. Your life without me, and mine without you. And eventually we would come to the topic of our history. Are you gonna ask me to come back to you? And if you do, I don't know what I'm gonna tell you, or if I'm gonna have the heart to leave him for you.

These days, walking up the stairs to my 5th floor apartment, I'd be hoping to see you waiting in front of my door. But I know for a fact you will never be there. Not ever again.

I pray for your happiness and my happiness. Amin.
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I read somewhere that love is wonderful, but the practice is taxing. How very true. Every single time I got into a fight with the boyfriend, I questioned myself what did I get myself into, as if the previous relationship taught me nothing.

God knows how much I miss you, H.
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But I won't lie, I found a love, I had to rediscover

May 17, 2009; we were in Phuket celebrating love, life and your birthday.

Happy birthday, I wish for you (and I), nothing but happiness.
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Love's on its way, hope it won't be too late

I think I *AM* one selfish, self-centered and self-absorbed bitch. Not gonna deny that.

Sorry, baby.. Sigh..
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