In love with love

20.10.2010. Who would've thought. We were just 2 months shy from hitting a year. I know why it didn't work.

Alright, goodbye R, H.. I can do this.

'Fess Up Friday : Love You Till The End (?)

Been a while since the last 'Fess Up Friday. Ok, here goes.

*tarik nafas dalam-dalam*

RP asyik muncul dalam mimpi sejak dua menjak ini. Ironinya aku sudah lepaskan dia. Betul, sumpah. Keliru, kenapa dia kerap dalam ingatan subkonsius ku?

Aku sudah janji dengan diri sendiri bahawa Si Perasan Gorjes tidak mahu lagi jadi Si Perempuan Gila yang sekejap gembira, sekejap meratap dalam hidupnya. Lelah.

There's gotta be more to life

Give me RM10k in cash and my life would be just right. Just nice. Just the simple mediocre but happy life that I could live in with.

Just RM10k to solve all problems then I'll be happy dah.

Duit, duit.. Di mana kau duit..??

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Oil and water

They say when you love someone you have to let them go. If they came back, then they were meant for you. I have let him go so many times before, and he came back time and time again. But not anymore. Maybe we've lost the magic eh.

Sigh, today shall be my last day of (almost) a year of grieving.

Here's to Goodbye to three years and two months (or more) of love and hate. He was my first, my first true love, my first longest relationship, first in so many ways.

Sorry it took me this long, but believe me it wasn't easy.

Adieu.

*inhales*

Another toast to love, life and hopes.

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Don't be such a bitch, you little fat ugly bitch

Just when I was set on letting go, some ugly fat bitch is agitating me. That was 2 months ago and now only did you find out about it? Haha.

Oh well. You got it all right. My motives are pretty obvious aren't they? And I guess it worked just the way I wanted it. Coz if it didn't, you wouldn't get all worked out about it. *evil laughs*

Sigh. Clearly you are very insecure. And you don't know him well enough to know that your boyfriend would not approve of you bashing me like that, or anyone for that matter.

Oh boy, that gives me an idea. ;)
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

I will let go

I've never been a fan of self-inflicted pain. I cringe just by looking at other people's wounds. Obviously my tolerance for pain is zero.

But lately I've been doing a lot of self-inflicted harm to myself. Poking at old scabs till it bleeds and makes me cry.

Sigh. I have to stop this insanity.

Last night I had a dream. I couldn't remember the whole thing but there were people from the past in that dream. They were telling me to let go.

Alright, I will. I think it was a sign. I will. God, help me.
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Gatal must be your middle name

Menyampah la tengok kau dik. Tapi akak paham, tengah syok bercinta macam tu la dik, semua indah kan? Baru 6 bulan bercinta dah nak kahwin bagai, gatalnya! Ish ish..
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone